a kid from my school sent me a pic an elaborate painting of atticus finch shirtless smoking a blunt while a colt 45 is being poured on him along with a text that read “hot dad 2: dad harder” and this is the closest thing to a sext I have ever received
You neglected to mention the Tupac and Biggie cherubs how dare you.
look there’s a lot going on here it makes perfect sense that they’d forget some details
Dad jokes brought to you by Rick Grimes
i went to my great aunts funeral today, which was interesting and sad because i found out so much about her.
- she got the first face lift ever in new zealand
- she had a “glass act” (pictured above) where she would wash her face and body in broken glass and not get slightly scratched. when members of the audience tried, they were grievously injured.
- she once hypnotized 500 people for fun and then asked them to go and stand on a highway, so that cars couldn’t pass. she got in a lot of trouble because the crowd got so large that there was a national traffic crisis.
- her act included hypnotizing people into walking to work in their underwear, with their consent of course, and one of the men who had actually done it came to the funeral.
at her funeral all these people who had been in her act showed up and talked about how great she was, how she was gifted and crazy and i suppose i’m sad and happy about it.
*swipes debit card*
*purchase goes through*
me: God is good all the time
Cashier: all the time God is good
Short people are closer to the ground and closer to satan
Okay, this is actually what you do if you’re being sexually harassed in any kind of public space. Draw attention to it, preferably pull away and let EVERYONE know that someone is touching you. This will not only get him to get off you but he’ll definitely think about this situation next time he wants to do something like this.
Spreading the word.
My mom and I were talking about this today after hearing about a woman who was molested on a plane who said nothing until she was picked up at the airport by her parents. My mom looked at me and asked what I would do in that situation and I looked her dead in the eye and I told her “it would take me .02 seconds to realize what was going on and yell angrily, and then I would be straight on to bitch slapping him so hard he wouldn’t be able to see the punch I’d throw with the opposite hand”.
She nodded and accepted my salty language like a seasoned sailor.
I’ve had experience with this before, in Prague a group of five girls and I were followed by three men at night. After a while they started yelling at us, the most common being “how much?” Meaning how much we “cost” as prostitutes. Seeing as they weren’t going to stop, I turned on my heel, faced them (which surprised them), spat at their feet and responded with “You couldn’t afford me.” This prompted the other girls to start yelling back at them as well, starting with our spitfire Czech friend to start slinging curses in Czech as she and the rest of the girls came up beside me. Needless to say the men backed off and pretty much fled. They weren’t expecting a fight. It empowered me and encouraged the rest of the girls to yell back too.
I’ve heard that a lot of people don’t know what to do in this situation because they’ve been taught all their lives to be polite and non-aggressive. Keep your heads down or whatever.
Keep in mind that studies have shown that rapists look for victims who won’t fight back.
Remember that nobody has the right to touch you without your consent or harass you, and you have all the right to make the biggest fuss about it that you can possibly make.
Get angry. Be in command.
2005 wasn’t just 2005
it was the beginning of an era
Tell me about it
i think this just proves the idea that the nineties era didn’t end till around 2004-2005
“it’s like having a DJ in your slippers!”
this is a gag gift box. some people are gullible as fuck
20 years ago today my house burned down, so I wrote a comic about it.
this is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever read, and it’s a cartoon about an inbred cat who foams at the mouth.
i have class in six hours and instead of sleeping, i’m crying D:
OH MY GOD
GO READ IT
Oh my god, I just realized—when I was making that Tuckington thing with the helmets a little more evil, I had Tucker say over the radio, “Was it worth it?” And I was like, “Oh man, that’s such a sad thing for Tucker to say, that’s so awful, that’s so…wait, why does that sound familiar?”
gavin and ryan
being sore losersresorting to dirty tactics in go! episodes 9 and 18, as requested by bryn.
[BANGS FISTS ON TABLE] GRIMMONS